Rudakubana is a Riot

The British people are rioting in the streets against their country’s immigration policies—like everywhere else in the civilized Western world. X and Elon Musk being blamed for inciting and supporting the anger and violence. You have to blame someone, right? The politicians in power can’t blame themselves and their policies. They can’t blame the shameful way they exploit and marginalize their own blood, their own native-born constituents.

Liberal think decrees that only “right-thinking” persons should be allowed to express themselves freely in society. If you are a dissident or you disagree with the powers that be, you should be silenced, isolated, excluded, and penalized. Marxists stigmatize their opponents. They create straw men, the better to demolish them in the popular imagination. They cannot even wait to turn public opinion against them, based on what they are in reality. That is how much power obsesses liberals. There is no honor or respect among liberals for anything.

Liberals don’t want to live in the world with people whose thinking and speech they cannot control. The way liberals think, in a world with diverse ways of thinking, conversing, and living, someone has to go and it’s not going to be them. That’s why they’re obsessed with political power and forcing others into submission. They are determined to rout their opponents out and eliminate them. Freedom of expression is an evil not tolerated by liberal, Marxist ideology and its power structures. It’s all about power, not political thinking and ideology. It’s all about who shall rule! And in the Marxist world it’s not going to be you. The Marxists will not even allow you to speak your mind, and when they learn how to do it, they will not let you think your own thoughts.

Axel Rudakubana a seventeen year old, black child of immigrant parents from Rwanda. He murdered three white girls on July 29, 2024, at a Taylor Swift party in Southport near Liverpool. Native Britains are rioting all over the country in response to the murders and their perceived connection to immigration policy.

Journal Entry

I don’t think sex is a gift from God. I think it’s just part of the human condition. A man can enjoy sex and pursue it without idolizing it and exalting it beyond reason. It would be more honest to admit that sex demeans man than to go on about what a wonderful gift it is from the Master of the Universe. I’m not saying that I’m asexual. I like sex, especially homosexual sex. I enjoy intimacy with another person. I like men. I’m sexually and emotionally drawn to men. Is that a bad thing? I don’t see how it possibly can be. How can human affection ever be bad? That’s something I’ve never understood. A lot of my interest in men is social and emotional. I don’t have to be sexual with a man to be interested in him, and to want to know him. But, there are a lot of men with whom I’d like to be sexual. All my life, I’ve been socially and sexually attracted to men, and a lot of them have been attracted to me too. This feeling of social and sexual interest is not a one-way street.

Journal Entry

 Moses—Hear O Israel:  the LORD our God is one LORD (Deuteronomy 6:  4):  Thou shalt love the LORD thy God with all thine heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy might (Deuteronomy 6:  5).  Jesus—Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind (Matthew 22:  37).  See Mark 12:  30; and Luke 10:  27. 

holiness  health  vitality
retire  mom  house
write  pray  home

Prayer is refraining from error and evil, doing good, and loving God.  That’s what prayer means.  That’s what I should do when I pray.  That’s what I try to do.  I’m better at it sometimes than others.  Sometimes I don’t do a good job of it at all.  But, I keep going back to do it again and do it some more.  Hopefully, I’ll get better at it with practice.  Writing can be a species of doing good.  Writing is a kind of doing good, a way of doing good.  One knows nothing about writing without doing it regularly.  One knows nothing about writing without making a commitment to it.  If I commit to writing and do it regularly, I will learn something about it and myself as a writer.  A man can’t learn how to write without doing it.  Commitment.  Practice.  Self-awareness.  Self-knowledge.  Sharing.  Unselfishness.  Love.  Affection.  Enjoyment.  Joy. Learning how to live and living righteously unto the end.  One should not stop living righteously until the end.  Don’t anticipate or surrender to death until the end.  Don’t make the forever sense of mortality a condition for righteous living.  Live righteously because righteous living is eternal.  Eternity is the essence of righteous living.  Cultivate and express righteousness and holiness in yourself.  Live holy and righteously.  Do good.  Refrain from evil and error.

Elisha and The Prophet's Wife

And Elisha said unto her, What shall I do for thee? Who am I, or what am I that you should look to me for relief? I have no worldly goods to give you. I have not saved up worldly riches to help the poor. It would behoove you to look to God, the source of all substance and being, in your time of need. But, I will help you. I will do what I can for you, to bless you, because I feel compassion for you and your sons. I will share my understanding of God with you by arousing your faith in Him. We will enlighten your understanding of substance and supply by demonstrating it with a pot of oil and some empty vessels. We will keep you and your sons busy exercising faith in the Provider of all good, and you will have what you need. And it was so (II Kings 4).

Celebrate God in Christ

The LORD is my strength and my shield; my heart trusted in him, and I am helped (Psalms 28). Spirit is the only substance and consciousness recognized by divine Science (S & H: p. 278). The objects cognized by the physical senses have not the reality of substance. They are only what mortal belief calls them (S & H: p. 311). This is a specimen of the ambiguous nature of all material health-theories (S & H: p. 388).

The prodigal son shows us that it is good and natural to celebrate right thinking and spiritual consciousness. Whether we are steadfast in Spirit or returning to the right standard, it always helps to celebrate spiritual being. Do you feel lost and disappointed by the world's prospects? Don't despair! Celebrate God in Christ, and you will be inspired and energized. You will find ways to make life better. You too can return to your Father and claim your place in His family. The Samaritan leper was healed by his own gratitude. It was a spiritual yearning which he must have felt even before Jesus helped him to bring it to the point of healing. And Jesus said to him, "Arise, go thy way: thy faith hath made thee whole" (Luke 17). Jesus had the power to heal those whose faith was not sufficient to make them whole. Were there not ten cleansed? but where are the nine? Only the Samaritan knew that he had bonded spiritually with Jesus and returned to thank him.

Family Name

God is the Father and we are his family, named after Christ. Christians. It is good to have a name, to be named. Ephesians 3: 15. It is good to look to the Father for sustenance and support. Mankind will not endorse, promote, and provide for you. Mortals thrive on a selfish instinct. It is human nature to advance oneself to the exclusion and diminishment of others. We do it all the time. All the more reason to find substance in Spirit, God. Manna from heaven and water from the rock. Exodus 17: 6.

Substance

Glory.  Majesty.  Might.  Length.  Breadth.  Height.  Depth.  Ephesians 3; Science and Health, p. 520.  Manna.  Pulse.  Beans.  Water.  Daniel’s beans and water stave off hunger and preserve health better than the king’s meat and wine.  God.  Sustainer.  Protector.  Father.  Friend.  Manna in the desert.  Manna from heaven.  Beans and water in the king’s palace.  Celebration of the prodigal son.  The Samaritan leper’s gratitude and healing.  The glory, majesty, and might of God.

Mind 2/21/2021

3. Your faith should stand in the power of God.

6. Shun profane and vain babblings.

Nearness, not distance, lends enchantment to this view (p. 209). Christian Science brings God much nearer to man. The All-in-all, forever near (p. 596).

10. The righteous, and the wise, and their works, are in the hand of God. The words of wise men are heard in quiet.

Human power proportionate to its embodiment of right thinking (p. 225). Soul-sense comes to the human mind (p. 85). This corrective is an alterative (p. 423).

11. I the LORD thy God will hold thy right hand.

12. In quietness and in confidence shall be your strength.

Make your own terms with sickness (p. 391). Christian Mind-healing (p. 98).

14. Be of one mind.

The Holy Ghost enables you to demonstrate the rule of healing (p. 496). Be merciful, just, and pure (p. 497).

References

Eddy, M. B.  (1906).  Science and health with key to the scriptures.  Boston, MA:  The Christian Science Board of Directors.

Holy bible (King James version).  (n. d.).  Boston, MA:  The Christian Science Publishing Society.

Abraham obeyed by faith.

SUBSTANCE, OBEDIENCE, BLESSING, ART

What does the world see when it looks at me?  Old, fat, sick, and tired.  What do I have to offer that anyone in the world would want?  But, it’s still a blessing to oneself and others to be good and do the right thing.  Alright, I’m not going to change the world, and people aren’t beating a path to my door.  But, it’s still good for me and a blessing to others to study Christian Science, pray, commune with the divine Mind, be good, and do good.  It’s good to be calm, clear, inspired, and kind.  It’s good to look for ways to be a blessing to others.  It’s good to do the right thing, and to adhere to a moral code.  It’s good to be not afraid in the midst of confusion, uncertainty, lack, and discord.  It is good to obey God and venture forth like father Abraham to an unknown place and depend on the substance of Spirit to sustain one there.  The challenge is to do one’s part in the world, however small and undistinguished it might be, and abide in the consoling and invigorating substance of Mind at the same time.  Conscientious participation in the human story and inspired awareness of spiritual substance work together.  Learn to exercise the creative process of writing in the context of human endeavor with spiritual intent.  Writing isn’t everything, but it is something worth pursuing even if only as a pastime.  And, if it’s worth pursuing, it’s worth learning how to do it well.  Writing.  Trying to write.  Not writing.

What's It Worth?

ABDULLAH, COY, SERVANT, FOOL

Let’s not be either coy or dishonest. I’m a homosexual. I’ve been a homosexual for a long time. Homosexuality is my sexuality. Homosexuality is the sex I want. Homosexuality is the sex I desire. I’m not saying that my sexual position or orientation is right or moral; I’m simply saying that it’s what I am. For what it’s worth . . .  I’m not trying to teach anyone. I’m just a big blabber-mouth. I spend time writing. I spend time trying to write. I spend time doing other stuff than writing. Matthew and Elias. It was all Elias at first, but Matthew has come forward. Matthew has stepped up. There’s no fool like an old fool, and I’m an old fool. It took me a long time to learn that guys were more interested in having sex with me than they were in plumbing the depths of my intellect or spirituality. It has taken me a long time to learn how the world works. It has taken me a long time to learn what men are like and what they want. I want sex and relationships on my terms. I want to make decisions about the relationships I have with men in my life. I don’t want to be the butt of other people’s decisions about me. I want to have some say about the way my life turns out. It has taken me a long time to see that spirituality is a personal choice and a way of life. It’s not a career. Spirituality is not a career choice. It’s a way of life choice. Spirituality isn’t what one does to win others over. It’s not a popularity contest. I don’t devote myself to spiritual things with the thought that others should take note. I can’t control how others see me. I can’t require that other people see me the way I see myself. Each of us views the world through a personal lens. I made decisions about my life. I made decisions about how to live my life. I did what I thought was best. I did what I thought was right. I have always tried to do the right thing. I have not always known what the right thing is.

I'm a masturbator.

MASTURBATION, BEATING OFF, BOYS & MEN

My name's Bruce and I'm a masturbator. I like to jerk off with other guys, and guys like jerking off with me. I use the phone sex line 605-475-6720 (code: 401315), which used to be BateNation, but is now a generic jo line. I don't know who owns or maintains it. There was a guy on recently who drives to a school parking lot and jerks off watching the boys playing on the sports field. He keeps a cum rag handy in the car. I talked to a married guy this morning who learned about sex and masturbation as a boy on his own. He wishes that he had learned about it with another boy. He wishes that he could have shared the pleasure and intensity of sexual discovery with a friend. He calls himself a breeder because he's married, but the thought of physical contact and mutual masturbation with another man excites him. He wants to have a discreet relationship of mutual sexual interest with another man.

What do I want? I'm not sure. I've been a masturbator for a long time. I've been sexually attracted to other men for a long time. I learned about masturbation and same-sex attraction simultaneously. I didn't know anything about sex and I was not especially attracted to other boys until Rusty Barnes and his brother Jimmy showed me how to "beat my meat." Sex changed my life. It opened my eyes to a world of possibilities. From then on I wanted to have sex with other boys. I wanted to find out how to meet them for mutual masturbation. I wanted to develop my skills at enticing other boys to jerk off with me. It's not hard to get boys to jerk off with you. The trick is to go where they are and signal clearly that you want it. Boys will jerk off together at the drop of hat. Young men and adults need a green light before they engage sexually with each other. The signal has to be clear and unambiguous. Adult men don't want to be exposed or embarrassed, and will not jeopardize their reputations recklessly. But, they will jerk off with you.

The Dying Man

DEATH, DISABILITY, FAILURE, ENDURANCE

Death doesn't always come quickly. It can be an incremental process which fills in the cracks of one's fractured hopes and dreams. Its harbingers are the inability to keep up as well as one used to, denial of the evidence of incompetence, and loss of motivation. Death is preceded by the decline into weariness, exhaustion, idleness, and sleep. There is no recuperative process for the dying man, just the prolonged exhibition of disappointment and inadequacy. It is not even the failure to recover a full life. He never had a full life to recover. He never even knew what it meant to be whole and to live fully in the world. Fullness eluded his comprehension. It is the failure to recover a life that seemed to have a fighting chance, a life that seemed to be worth fighting for, even with its apparent flaws. A life worth getting up in the morning to pursue. A life for which to be well. He reached a point where he could see his life slipping away, and he knew that he would let it go graciously. He did not want to fuss over the process of letting go of his life. He wanted to find the right way to do it. He wanted to find the right way to die. The ultimate failure, the final disappointment, done well.

City of God

CITY, VIOLENCE, CITIZEN, SALVATION

The City of God is the New Jerusalem coming down from God out of heaven.

The spiritual reality is the scientific fact in all things. Prepare for the reign of Spirit, the kingdom of heaven,—the reign and rule of universal harmony. Understand that sickness is not real and that Truth can destroy its seeming reality, . . . for this understanding is the universal and perfect remedy. The realm of the real is Spirit. (Eddy, 1906)

Thou shalt call thy walls Salvation, and thy gates Praise (Isaiah 60).  Inherit the kingdom prepared for you from the foundation of the world (Matthew 25). Glorious things are spoken of thee, O city of God (Psalms 87). Abraham looked for a city which hath foundations, whose builder and maker is God (Hebrews 11).

To write freely and regularly is a blessing. Here I speak the truth and eschew foolishness and brutality. Here I say what is on my mind without fear. Here I cast my bread upon the waters. Here I am myself for better or worse. I want it to be for better, but it may not always be. Hubris, hatred, and violence are the hallmarks of our culture and our world. Foolishness, indifference, and mad ambition reign in the public square. The voices of wise and gentle souls are repressed. Getting one's way has been elevated above civility and the values of a free society. Brutality and self-promotion beat the drum and devise new and devious ways to enthrall and enslave the masses. And, in the midst of partisan depravity endorsed by aggressive fake news, normal people try to live their lives with a modicum of enjoyment. It isn't easy, but we do the best we can.

Talking to the Night

PEEPING, CHATTERING, TALKING

I am like a little bird peeping and chattering in the night. People hear me, but barely take notice. My tone is not sufficiently alarming to pierce the boundary of consciousness. But, I’m out there talking to the night. It’s the urge to talk, the need for expression which supersedes the notion that anyone wants to hear me. It’s the desire to communicate which transcends the understanding of what it is that others want to hear. I don’t know what you want. I barely know what I want. But, there are things I want to say, things that need to be said, even if I’m the only one who thinks so.

Exploring Parameters

ROMANCE, SEX, PUSSY BOYS

The key to sex is to pursue guys who are likely to be attracted to you. Don't waste time wooing guys who aren't interested in homosexual sex. Don't have crushes on pussy boys. Leave the boys alone who are afraid of being with other boys. Boys who find safety and security in sex with girls don't have the sense of adventure that I want in a friend and sex partner. Girls, marriage, fatherhood, family life—that's not my way. I chose not to live that way. I thought from the start that it was dishonest for a guy like me to live like that. I wanted sex and relationships with other guys. I wanted to be honest. I wanted to explore the parameters of loving men.

Haute Cuisine

NIEDERMYER, WILLIAMSPORT, COLLEGE, FOOD

I've got a crush on Chef Niedermyer. I love a man in uniform and he's a handsome hunk. I'd like to visit Le Jeune Chef in Williamsport, Pennsylvania, to sample his pastries.

Chef Charles Niedermyer, Penn College of Technology

Photo: Retrieved July 3, 2018, from https://1qzhau6kk8450yyu2co5tiaq-wpengine.netdna-ssl.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/05/Chef-Charles.jpg. PCToday, Pennsylvania College of Technology.

All about men.

EXCITEMENT, ENJOYMENT, MEN, LIFE

Life is odd. It isn't easy. I want it to be one thing, but it turns out to be something else. Writing is about what life is, not what I want it to be. Is that right? Isn't writing about finding out what life is and telling other people about it? My life is about my love for men. My life is about how I love men. It's about looking at men and wanting to know them and be with them. Life is about having an excuse to spend time with a handsome man. You can have all the rest. Just give me a handsome, sexy man to pass the time with, and I will be content. I'm not even asking him to love me. That's where sex comes in. That's where sex is handy and useful. Sex gives guys an excuse to spend time together. When all else fails, have sex.

Schmucks like I

SCHMUCK, TWEET, GEM, PLATFORM

The point is to say things that matter. The point is to go public with my private thoughts that matter. What's the best platform for a thinker and writer like I? Blogs are old hat, aren't they? Well, I'm kind of old hat too. Maybe the blog is where an old-hat kind of guy like I belongs. Should I be a tweeter? Would tweeting make any difference to me or anyone else? Are there people out there, waiting with bated breath for my verbal gems? Ah, I don't think so. The point is to step up and speak up. The point is to go public. Everyone else does. Why shouldn't I? My life matters! And, media provides the means and the opportunity for even schmucks like I to have our say.

Thinking about sex.

SEX, GUYS, WRITING, TALKING

I don't like the idea of just writing for myself. I don't like the idea of writing badly and putting it on display. I don't like the idea of showing the whole world what a putz I am, but it's better than doing nothing at all. I'd rather be a putz than a zero. I'm getting old. I don't have a lot of time left. I want to make the best of it. I don't want to spend the rest of my life not telling you who I am. I want to spend the rest of my life being myself. Oh, yuck! Oh, boring! Oh, stupid! Oh, well.

Blogging is already old hat, but it's a step up for me. A step out. A turning of my face toward the world. Coming out. Not hiding out. What do I have to hide? Nothing. And, do you know why? Because no one cares. No one gives a damn about anything I do. I don't want to hide. I want to make the most of things. I want to be myself. I want to make my best effort.

I'm a talker. I like to talk. I like to tell you what I'm thinking about. I like to tell you about what I did today, and what I think about it. One of the wonders of the world is how it can't tell me what to be. There may be things that the world will fight tooth and nail to prevent me from being, but it can't tell me what to be. The world will give me all kinds of reasons why I can't be or do something, but it can't tell me what to be. I don't want to be perfect in my own eyes or in the world's eyes. I'm tired of trying to be perfect. I'm tired of trying to impress people with my qualifications. Qualified for what? Who cares! No one. Me too.

I don't want to impress you with my writing. I do want to write to you. I want to tell you what's on my mind. I want to tell you what I did today. I don't really care whether I impress you or not. I just want to make the effort to tell you. In a world that's falling apart, the time to be shy about talking has passed. I want to talk to you. I don't want to be perfect for you. I want to talk to you. I want to tell you what I did today. I want to tell you about the handsome, sexy guy I saw this morning at Starbucks. I don't know his name yet, but I want to. He's married and has a daughter. He has a low voice.  He's big. He's not a skinny little guy. I've never seen him with anyone. He always comes to Starbucks on his own. I don't want to see him with his wife or daughter. I just want to see him. I just want him. I don't want to be his best friend. I don't necessarily want to be his friend at all. I'd like to masturbate with him, suck his dick, and make out with him. That's all. Not a big deal. I don't want to take a lot of his time, or waste a lot of mine. I don't have a lot of time to waste. I don't have a lot of energy to use. I want to tell you about the hunky guys I like to look at. I don't want to be a great writer. I just want to write. I don't want to be perfect. I just want to talk to you.

I want you to know that I will get up this morning looking forward to the handsome guys I will see throughout the day. Mom and I are going to the Wareham Walmart this morning. We will see handsome young men working there. We will see good-looking guys shopping there. Guys I can think about having sex with.

Bible Lesson 12/3/17

BIBLE, CREATOR, CHRISTIAN SCIENCE

God the Only Cause and Creator:

O Lord, how manifold are thy works! (Psalms 104). . . .  Come and see the works of God (Psalms 66).

good--My presence shall go with thee, and I will give thee rest (Exodus 33).

peace--I sought the LORD, and he heard me, and delivered me from all my fears (Psalms 34).

health--To all mankind and in every hour, divine Love supplies all good (Eddy, 1906, p. 494).

immortality--God does not cause man to sin, to be sick, or to die (Eddy, 1906, p. 206).

vastness--In the vast forever, in the Science and truth of being, the only facts are Spirit and its innumerable creations (Eddy, 1906, p. 478).

References

Eddy, M. B.  (1906).  Science and health with key to the scriptures.  Boston, MA:  The Christian Science Board of Directors.

Holy bible (King James version).  (n. d.).  Boston, MA:  The Christian Science Publishing Society.